Sunday, April 13, 2008

Endorsement from Ventoux

Sunday, 1:00pm (that means afternoon Brian) PST, 65 degrees farenheit, Music: U-Roy's "Train from the West", hands down the greatest rhythm from reggae's golden age.
Recently a friend of mine sent an email that began with "I have never made a political endorsement before...". To give some context, this friend is easily the smartest person I have met since leaving the confines of Rice, a school so good Brian named his first born son after a dorm there. He is in fact smart enough to show up at Willie's and go all Good Will Hunting on young Reagan from Bellaire. I imagine his time at the University of Oregon was akin to Jim Brown's career on the Syracuse lacroose team.
Anyway, after going in to work and potting some new plants for my desk and picking up the lovely Candy I decided to stop for a beer at the Eugene City Brewery. I like to go there because they carry the Rogue Voice, a newspaper out of San Luis Obispo. They carry this particular alternative weekly, published by a group of drunks and dropouts, because they serve Rogue beer and somehow the drunkards of these two particular business ventures managed to hook up. I'm wandering I know, but after 1,100 crunches, obliques, flutter kicks, etc. yesterday I've decided to enjoy my day of rest, so stick with me. There was an article that mentioned the theory that many people voted for G-Dub because he was the candidate that they would prefer to have a drink with. Along those lines I have decided to make my first official political endorsement. At first, I considered Hillary on some Good Will Hunting "Fuck the Conservatives, thats why." bullshit. Plus, I'm guessing Bill keeps the crib stocked with Belvedere and Hennessy for the occasional jump off. Then I realized there was a candidate who spoke to me personally. Fortuitously, it is the same candidate who spoke to my big brained friend, a registered Republican for the record, though for much more trivial reasons. You see, much like Obama, I do not smoke cigarettes (as far as you know, unless you drink with me, then you know). This is a man I trust to understand the importance of Single Payer Health Care (What up Lung Cancer?!?). If he can convince the nation that he no longer smokes (try getting the monkey off your back in the middle of hundred hour a week campaigning and let me know how that goes. Stress does not in fact equal success) and I can convince the family that I quit a decade ago, then together we can bring a new age to our great country. I don't normally endorse Marlboro light smokers (What up Winston!), but I stand before you today to tell you this is one I can wholeheartedly support. Plus, unlike the Republican candidate, Im told he supports all 10 ammendments to the Bill of Rights, not just the second (for white folks anyway).


  1. Dude,

    Sorry to inform you, but your homey, Sam Brownback withdrew from the race. I know you two share the same view that a woman should not have a choice for abortion even in cases of rape & incest, don't give a damn about the environment, and believe in the flat tax, but damn, son, you know darn well the Magnum Series is a non-political blog. (even though Team Joe Camel has contributions to the tobacco industry on record).

    Sounds like you've been drinking too much Oregon moonshine. That's fine with me. Crash has taken his training to the next level. See you at the Eugene Half Marathon.

  2. All actions are political actions.
    I believe my endorsement was for Obama. Sadly the Starbucks drip venti sipping Saab driving "liberals" of this country are too worried about the inheritance tax to rally behind Dennis Kucinich. I was going to give you a day to catch up since you had a travel day after your difficult week of, oh wait, you were on vacation. I've been itching to do crunches all day long...

  3. All I've got is a Central Coast Shoutout, "WOOP, SLO TOWN!"