Tuesday, April 1, 2008

Tour de Mukilteo


I was surfing the internet, and I came across your website. Wow, pretty impressive! Well, I just wanted to see if you would allow a professional to compete in your Tour de Mukilteo. What really attracted me to your race is that there are lots of hills (I'm kinda good at them) and your liberal drug testing policies. I think this would be a perfect race for me to stage a comeback.
Just to show you that I'm legit, I'd also like to compete in this month's AB contest. It's not too late, because I noticed a woman named Amber just joined this morning. I also realize some people may not believe this is the real Floyd, so feel free to comment. I don't mind proving myself.


  1. Dear Mr. Landis,

    If you are really who you say you are, then you'll know the answer to this question. Is your dad Jewish, Catholic, Atheist, or does he believe in Scientology?

  2. Good question Crash. He's none of the above. He's a devout Mennonite. I'm for reals.

  3. Floyd, let me know how this works out. My undeveloped fetal twin brother and I are looking to get back into racing. Gotta go, I gonna go snap my collarbone with a hammer and then do the laundry to show my wife how tough and gritty I still am.